It's that time of year again. The time when theme parks open and kids start nagging. With many potential Easter outings curtailed because of foot and mouth, you may even have to start listening to them.
The outbreak has forced Alton Towers to cull most of its animals. Thorpe Park, Chessington and Drayton Manor have either cordoned off farm areas or moved susceptible species away. The parks are therefore concentrating on offering thrills and spills this season. The only major park to decide not to open at present is Oakwood in Pembrokeshire (Megafobia will be sorely missed!).
Here is the inside track to the best rides and what's new. All the parks are either already open or opening this weekend.
Blackpool Pleasure Beach
0870 444 5566
The park boasts five woodies - that's wooden roller coasters to the uninitiated - more than anywhere else on earth. My favourite is Grand National, a twin-track 60- year-old racer that never fails to get the adrenaline running. The park also boasts five steel roller coasters - steelies - which explains why it's my, and my 12- and 15-year-olds, favourite park.
Nothing new this year but who cares? Last year they splashed out £15 million on Valhalla 2000's barrage of special effects. The Pepsi Max Big One is Europe's tallest, fastest and best steel roller coaster - 235ft tall with a 65 first drop, followed by an 85mph ride over a mile of track. Limber up with Ice Blast - 80mph and 4.5g going up, 30 mph and -1g going down!
Opening hours: Daily until 4 November 2001. Opening and closing times vary, so ring ahead.
Admission price: Unlimited ride wristbands £25, pink or white-knuckle sheets of tickets £24, Beaver Creek Children's Park wristbands £10.95 or sheets of tickets £10.
Alton Towers
Staffordshire
08705 204 060
Apart from great rides, Alton Towers is the most civilised park with pretty gardens and a Skyride which floats you around high above the ground. New last year was Hex - a haunted swing ride through a turning cursed room (not a white knuckler unfor tunately). The £12m Oblivion opened three years back - some love it but I'm not one of them. You queue for hours, are cranked to a precipice, held tantalisingly over the edge and then dropped 200 feet at 70mph into a black hole. It's all over in a twinkling. Far better is the sustained excitement of Nemesis, one of the truly great rides with thick-and-fast thrills, providing 'four seconds of total weightlessness and brain-scrambling g-forces of 4'. Second only to the Pepsi Max in my book. Other goodies to look out for are Ripsaw, Corkscrew, Black Hole (dark coaster), and Submission.
Opening hours: From 9.30am daily (rides open at 10) until 28 October. Closing time varies.
Admission price: Adults £17, children aged 4-12 £14. Under 4s free, family-of-four £60.
Drayton Manor
Tamworth, Staffordshire
01827 287979;
A much under-rated park that has invested massively in rides over the past few years. The newly-themed children's area, Robinsons Land opens this year. The major new ride last year, Apocalypse, remains the world's only stand-up tower drop (180 feet - that's more than the height of Nelson's Column). Stormforce 10 opened the year before - Europe's only wet-knuckle ride with a reverse drop (do this last as you'll get soaked). My own favourite, however, remains Shock Wave, the first and only stand-up coaster in Europe. A blast. For those of you who appreciate such matters, the 120-feet high steelie performs four inversions: two corkscrews, one loop and one heart-line spiral.
Opening hours: Daily from 9am (rides from 10.30am) until 28 October, closing times vary.
Admission price: Adult (age 14 and over) £15, child (900mm-13 yrs) £11, child under 900mm free, family (2 adults 2 kids) £47, family-of-five £58.
Pleasureland
Southport
08702 200 204
Pleasureland Southport has invested £12m in new rides and attractions over the last three years, £5m of which went on TRAUMAtizer, the tallest, fastest suspended coaster in the UK. A visit to the Moroccan Fun House is a must as it's one of the world's last traditional fun houses with pink-knuckle action including the wooden joy wheel, social mixer and rotating barrel, plus ball pools, and moving walkways. New last year was King Solomon's Mines, a classic woodie which joined its big brother The Cyclone. It complements Pleasureland's three steelies, TRAUMAtizer, The Wild Cat, and The Big Apple kiddie coaster. The park was voted 'Most promising park for the new millennium' by the Roller Coaster Club of Great Britain.
Opening hours: Open until 4 November 2001. Open every day during Easter and daily from 29 April to 16 September. Opening and closing times plus certain weekends vary according to time of year, especially October onwards.
Admission price: Those over 1.2metres pay £13.99 for unlimited ride wristbands, the pink-knuckle wristband (1 metre-1.2 metres) £9.99, child/Aliba Bear wristband (under 1 metre) £5.99, family-of-four unlimited rides £44.
Chessington World of Adventures
Surrey
0870 444 7777
Less white-knuckle heaven, more family fun. New attractions this year include Trail of the Kings, a jungle-themed animal experience enabling families to get close to one of the biggest gorilla families in Europe, and some of the world's most rare and endangered big cats. Young adventurers will find new surprises in Toytown with Toadie's Crazy Cars and two Berry Bouncers; and a new Bash Street Bus in Beanoland. An old favourite - the Flying Jumbos ride - has also been given a colourful new look to appeal to tots. Other family favourites include Dragon Falls and Rattle Snake. For white knuckle thrills try Rameses Revenge and Samurai.
Opening hours: Open 10am (closing times vary) until 28 October (closed some days in September and October).
Admission price: Adults £19.95, children (4-12 years inclusive) £16, under 4s free. Family-of-four tickets £63.
Thorpe Park
near Chertsey, Surrey
0870 444 4466
Sensory overload is on the cards at the UK's fastest changing theme park with three new white-knuckle rides this year. The Detonator winches its brave riders 100ft into the air and then fires them back to earth at 75km per hour. The Vortex subjects its riders to 15 high-speed rotations per minute while swinging back and forth at a vertigo-inducing 65ft above the ground (this is probably best done before lunch). Zodiac takes riders through 360 at 30km per hour. Of the old favourites, Tidal Wave, Europe's highest water drop ride, provides the obligatory soaking. Loggers Leap, Thunder River, and Neptune's Beach provide more aquatic mayhem. I can't wait for the world's first 10-looping coaster that's scheduled to open next year.
Opening hours: Open from 10am until 28 October (closed some days in September and October).
Admission price: Adults £19, children (4-12 years inclusive) £15, children under one metre free. Tickets for a family-of-four cost £59.
