Yew Tree Farm B&B is about to become extremely famous. Renée Zellweger spent two days filming Miss Potter here, and can be seen in movie stills standing in the front garden.
Had you ever heard of the farm? No, neither had I. Yet Beatrix Potter created a tearoom at Yew Tree Farm in the 1930s to help the tenant farmers in a kind of early version of diversification. It closed during wartime and remained shut until the current tenants, Jon and Caroline Watson, decided to pull the dustsheets off Potter's furniture, get some scones on the go and open this historic parlour to the public once again.
I just hope Yew Tree Farm, which is owned by the National Trust, is going to be ready for its close-up.
It didn't help that my bloke managed to jettison his pot of jam onto the tearoom floor, but frankly the carpet was in such dire condition that anything which hastened its departure from this world would have been doing it a favour. I like a good mystery, and as I surveyed dingy wallpaper and plastic flower arrangements, I was intrigued why the National Trust hadn't ensured the decor was up to scratch. Isn't it something to do with Farrow & Ball paint?
Our bedroom reminded us of Dougal and Father Ted's, but - sighs of relief all round - its days are numbered. The B&B and tearoom are closing for refurbishment. An application for a grant from Cumbria Tourism is likely, by the time you read this, to have been approved, so all should be on track for a smarter interior by April. If you want to get in before the Japanese and Americans shoehorn it into their summer holiday itineraries, my advice is to book now.
A four-poster room is being created in the oldest, cruck-framed part of the house, and an existing en suite double and a double with private bathroom will be given a good tart up with William Morris wallpapers and the aforementioned paints. So old is the farmhouse that the upstairs is made entirely of oak - not just the floors, but the walls as well - which means that sound carries (snoring from next door penetrated even my earplugs). The new configuration should improve things greatly while retaining rustic charm.
Caroline Watson is on a mission to create a true rural retreat so has vowed to remove the TV from the guests' sitting room, increase the antique quotient and add an outside hot tub so that after a day's walking around Tarn Hows or up the Old Man of Coniston, you can stew with a view.
We had no complaints on the tea front - scones, jam and cake all delicious. Perhaps I should also mention that Caroline can turn out better scrambled eggs at breakfast than I've eaten in some hotels. However, the Watsons are farmers first and foremost, and their real passion is their native Belted Galloway cattle and Cumbrian Herdwick sheep. They are depending on the growth of their mail-order company, Yew Tree Farm Heritage Meats (or you can buy from them while staying there, as we did) for the farm to survive.
Refurbished, Yew Tree Farm's interior should fulfil the lure of its film-poster exterior. If this in turn enables the Watsons to continue farming, then that's all to the good. The protection of fell farming and consequent preservation of the Lakeland landscape was, after all, why Beatrix Potter bequeathed her land to the Trust in the first place.
· Yew Tree Farm (01539 441433; yewtree-farm.com), Coniston, is taking bookings now for the luxury four-poster room, £52pp pn, £45 for a double room. Further information from Cumbria Tourism 01539 822222; visitenglandsnorthwest.com
Over to you
Share tips on other hotels and places to stayt at theguardian.com/beenthere.
