Yet another behemoth of a travel company?

It wasn't always so. Thomas Cook himself was a Baptist preacher who believed that his cheap railway excursions would help the Victorian working classes to drink less and become better educated.

Ah. So if he could see the TC-owned Club 18-30 site (www.club18-30.co.uk), supported by Bacardi Breezer, he would . . .

Turn in his grave, yes. But no doubt the current shareholders would argue that budget airline JMC opens up similar opportunities for today's impoverished travellers.

Get on with it.

Patience. I was just about to add that the major attraction here is some pleasingly cheap air travel - St Lucia for £219, Toronto at £203. That said, the main flight search can be unreliable, and the special offers can only be booked by phone.

The travel guides are a bit flaky. I typed in Namibia and the search engine couldn't find a thing.

You should have tried Ibiza. "You may see some outrageous things," warns the entry, "but you can be sure that whatever they are, the people who live here have seen it all before."

No need to worry about the locals when I've had a few at three in the morning, then? I don't think Thomas would have appreciated that.

Perhaps not. But just think how astonished he would have been to be able to order commission-free foreign currency online and receive it by registered post the next day. He could have booked insurance, too - the cover is reasonably comprehensive, but far from the best deal on the web.