Cruises
In their heyday ... cruising was the only way to travel. The glamour of the transatlantic route with six to eight weeks aboard while you spotted movie stars or aristos sadly became naffer and naffer as the decades progressed until Hyacinth Bucket types aspired to a seat on the captain's table and talked about the same things everyday to the same people.
The new look: Cruising still has a loyal following among the 50-plus-somethings but newcomer easyCruise (0906 292 9000, easycruise.com) is targeting a younger crowd. It tugs up and down the Italian and French rivieras from as little as £29.50pp per night (minimum two-night stay). The only downside is the orange cabin decor - tough on the hangover - so you'll just have to turn the lights out.
Where to hang out: Romance over a game of shuffle board? Nope, try clubbing and vodka. There is a cocktail bar where you can drink in a Jacuzzi or a sports bar that becomes a club with DJ. Just hope you don't get seasick.
Getting there: The ship docks at a new destination every day so you can board at Nice, Cannes, St Tropez, Monaco, Genoa, Portofino or Imperia.
Madeira
In its heyday ... there used to be a flying boat service between Southampton and Funchal but the glamour nosedived. "Hmmm, let's look at some more gardens" - so Derek (firm crease in those jeans) and Ethel while complaining about the foreign food and the Daily Mail being a day late, wonder how the locals garden in such heat. Hotels were full of gin and Jag types (chunky gold bracelets, male-only golf club) picking holes in everything and having a thoroughly awful time, just like they did when they came last year and the year before.
The new look: Smarter, more savvy cosmopolitan crowd who have travelled the budget flight trail in the past few years but now want a destination that is a bit more self-assured.
Staying in style: Reids Palace (00 351 291 717171, reidspalace.com, doubles from €395, B&B) still reeks of old gold, but the newer Casa Branca (00 351 291 700 700, quintacasabranca.pt, doubles from €165, room only) is a much sleeker, leather sofa, glass walls affair. Choupana Hills Resort & Spa (00 351 291 2060 20, choupanahills.com, doubles from €251, B&B) has warm but stylish interiors, a cute spa and a fantastic view over the Atlantic from the infinity pool. Elegant Resorts (01244 897515, elegantresorts.co.uk) offers packages to all three.
Where to hang out: Funchal is your best bet. Quiet during the week, the fun doesn't start until midnight come the weekend. Walk along Funchal's bar-strewn marina, pop into A Parreira where after a traditional meal the band strikes up, or any number of clubs - O Marginal, Vespas. Alternatively, sit at one of the long row of aluminium tables that surround the water's edge.
Getting there: GB Airways (0870 8509850, gbairways.com) flies from Gatwick from £169 return. Madeira Tourist Office (madeiratourism.org).
Malta
In its heyday ... Malta was one of the early leaders in the package holiday market. The less adventurous continued going there every year until they died of boredom amid jokes about Maltesers.
The new look: Quite the place for sword and sandal epics with both Troy and Gladiator being filmed here - even Russell Crowe would be pacified by the new chic, sophisticated feel of the place.
Staying in style: The recently-opened boutique Hotel Juliani (00 356 2138 8000, hoteljuliani.com; from £60 per double, room only) overlooks the fishing bay of St Julian's and has two good restaurants while the five-star Radisson (00800 3333 3333, radissonsas.com, doubles from £80, B&B) with a private beach is scheduled to open on July 1.
Where to hang out: St Julian's is Malta's main nightlife area, a mixture of the traditional and the contemporary, while the district of Paceville offers both raucous bars and secluded courtyards.
Getting there: GB Airways (0870 850 9850, gbairways.com) flies from Gatwick from £89. Malta Tourist Office (020-8877 6990, visitmalta.com).
Jersey
In its heyday ... they came to worship cream and soft brown, long-lashed cows and because it was a lot nicer than Margate and a bit posh. And there was that plane ride, which was exciting.
The new look: Surf dudes crowd the beaches till the early morning, dancing semi-naked round bonfires. The clubs bounce young bodies together and you might catch a glimpse of Katie Melua, Natasha Bedingfield or Anastasia, all of whom have recently stayed.
Staying in style: Longueville Manor (01534 725501, longuevillemanor.com, doubles from £210, B&B) is the most luxurious hotel with an haute cuisine restaurant, while the Atlantic Hotel (01534 744101, £190 per double B&B) is like a sleek art deco liner down by the beach but with a pool as well. The Pomme d'Or (01534 880110, pommedorhotel.com, £85pp per night) in the centre of St Helier has recently refurbed and hipped up.
Where to hang out: The beach is everything. Coasteering, blokarting, sea kayaking knacker you during the day and then you scramble ashore to the many beach bar shacks and restaurants. In the heart of St Helier, fresh seafood is a must at Bohemia (01534 880588) which has just been awarded a Michelin star, while the simpler Bistro Frere (01534 861000) on the island's northern coast has fabulous views to the French coast on a clear day. But who needs them? Surfies dance at Watersplash (01534 482885) on the seafront at St Ouen's or more mainstream is Quid on the waterfront.
Getting there: VLM (020-7476 6677, flyvlm.com) flies from London City from £57 return. Jersey Tourist Office (01534 500777, jersey.com).
Rimini
In its heyday ... it's possible that your Uncle Alf went here in the 1960s on a package tour to sit on the beach, knotted hanky on head, supping wine from bottles wrapped in straw and filled with antifreeze.
The new look: Smart casuals are hugging the new bars and hotels. Everything is clean lines and glass, but being Italy it has none of the coldness of minimalism elsewhere.
Staying in style: In the old days everybody stayed at the Grand Hotel (0039 0541 56000, grandhotelrimini.com, doubles from €225, B&B), filled with 18th-century Venetian and French antiques, but the sexiest new boys on the block include duoMo (00800 37 46 83 57, designhotels.com, bookings accepted shortly) that is due to open in July. With its entrance of pin ball flippers and a bar of polished stainless steel, it's going to be the season's must. Cheaper is the Agriturismo Locanda Antiche Macine (00 39 0541627161, doubles €52, B&B), a hilltop farm in 30 acres of olive and walnut trees producing its own meats, marmalades, jams, liqueurs, and even its own olive oil-based cosmetic range.
Where to hang out: The old town with its squares of al fresco bars remind you that this was Italy's favourite 19th-century seaside resort. New club on the horizon is Pascia (pasciariccione.it) which will open in June and feature a high-end restaurant and chill-out terrace with day beds.
Getting there: Ryanair (0871 246 0000, ryanair.com) flies from Stansted to Forlí (20 minutes from Rimini) from £33.87 return including tax. Rimini Tourist Office (0039 0541 430123, riminiturismo.it).
