Address: 10 Regency Square, Brighton BN1 2FG.
Tel: 01273 327055.
Web address: www.hotelpelirocco.co.uk

First impressions Five-storey Regency splendour.

What are the rooms like? Each individually designed according to your best-kept fantasy of sex, drugs, rock 'n' roll. There's Lenny Beige's Love Palace, Betty Page's Boudoir, Hysteric Glamour, Modrophenia, Hip Hop. I got Jamie Reid's Magic Room. It was a blast, man - John Wayne meets Boots No 7 - and that's before I tackled the complimentary PlayStation.

The bed test Big, comfy, and a bedspread with naughty words on it.

The bathroom test Not as kinky as Betty Page's, but nevertheless comfortable.

The restaurant Multi-purpose bar, breakfast room and lounge. Open from 8am to 4am.

What is there to see within walking distance? Brighton seafront and all its crazy, fun-packed attractions.

What is there to see within a 10-minute drive? The South Downs. Go walkies up Devil's Dyke.

How much a night? Doubles and twins from £65.

Would you go back? Wild horses couldn't stop me. This place epitomises Brighton - traditional and bohemian.