A decade ago, it was extremely rude about what Britain could offer overseas tourists. The subsequent furore provided much welcome publicity for the Lonely Planet guide and did little to deter the backpackers who bought it. There followed three further "controversial" reports complaining about "smelly Britons" (1997), depressing or decrepit northern towns (1999), and bad weather, undesirable food, and too many real live Fawlty Towers hotels (2001). Still the backpackers came. Then, abruptly, the biennial report changed tone. Guides need something fresh, otherwise there's no point in buying a new one. Indeed, so taken was the "team of writers" in 2003 that they were ready to "stick our necks out and describe Britain as one of the most beautiful islands on earth". Conveniently forgetting its previous four reports, it declared: "We think Britain deserves more praise than it gets." And so to yesterday's 2005 report.
The good news continues. Dynamic development has transformed the north. Manchester is "one of Britain's most exciting and interesting cities"; Leeds is the "Knightsbridge of the north", and Newcastle upon Tyne has displayed "miraculous powers of urban regeneration". Indeed, not only is it no longer "grim up north", but its cities are as "unmissable" as Rome, Venice or Florence: "the north-south divide is a myth". If only. Purchasers are advised to approach the £17 guide with the same caution as a real estate agency's description of a converted prison.
The truth is somewhat different. Northern cities are celebrating a revival, particularly in their centres. But it is going to take more than four years to reverse decades of relative decline. Even in the 1990s, Manchester, Newcastle, Liverpool were not just losing population, but worse still losing their best qualified young people. Far from getting narrower, the divide continues to widen. Like its Burma guide - which Lonely Planet published despite appeals not to from oppressed opposition leader Aung San Suu Kyi - the British guide contains misleading inaccuracies and loaded ethics.
